breaking the cycle

Back a thousand years ago, when I was married, my (now) ex said something to me which has stayed with me.  She said that how you were treated in your last relationship is how you will treat others in your next.  Put into more general terms, unless you actively attempt to break the cycle, how others have treated you forms how you treat others.

This thought came back to me this morning as I was reading an article about Israel and Palestine.  The problem really comes in what I would call a destructive echo chamber or feedback loop.  This is something which anyone with small children knows intimately.

Bobby does X, which means Sally can do X, which encourages Bobby to do X+1, which entitles Sally to reciprocate and and and....I'm stopping this car RIGHT NOW!

That's the point.  We need to stop the car (individually and collectively).  If the internet has taught me anything (other than every cat owner needs a video camera), it is that trolls, like the poor, will always be with us.  There will always be someone in a group who is insensitive, deliberately argumentative and generally irascible.  Do we treat them as they have treated us or do we treat them as we wish to be treated?