Double whammy for Tim

There's a lot going on here under the hood, so you'll excuse if things seem disjointed. Today is the feast day of Saint Timothy and the epistle reading below is from the beginning of second Timothy.

"Paul, an Apostle of Christ Jesus by the will of God for the promise of life in Christ Jesus, to Timothy, my dear child: grace, mercy, and peace from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Lord.
 ...
I remind you to stir into flame the gift of God that you have through the imposition of my hands.  For God did not give us a spirit of cowardice but rather of power and love and self-control."

According to legend, Timothy was called by God when he was a teenager, was an exceptionally apt pupil when it came to learning texts and became an intimate friend of Paul, who refers to Timothy as a son. Paul give 'his son' the following advice.

"Prescribe and teach these things. Let no one look down on your youthfulness, but rather in speech, conduct, love, faith and purity, show yourself an example of those who believe. Until I come, give attention to the public reading of Scripture, to exhortation and teaching. Do not neglect the spiritual gift within you, which was bestowed on you through prophetic utterance with the laying on of hands by the presbytery. Take pains with these things; be absorbed in them, so that your progress will be evident to all. Pay close attention to yourself and to your teaching; persevere in these things, for as you do this you will ensure salvation both for yourself and for those who hear you." (I Tim. 4)

So?

So, my first name is Timothy, who heard the call of God when I was a teenager.  Yes, I'm pretty keen with a book.  All of those things struck me when I heard the reading above at mass.  I've read scripture for a long time, but hearing it said in another persons' voice, especially brother Les' mellifluous and sonorous baritone, is different.  More to the point, unlike most any other reading, that was to me..personally...My name.  "Timothy, my dear child."  It felt as if there was nobody else there.

That's when I knew the door had closed.  I can't just sit in the pews...mumble through the forms...just be a 'good guy' and average parishoner.  What kind of formal orders (or if they are even necessary) doesn't matter, but that Call...that Voice...I cannot ignore it. 

Lessons from the saints - conversion of Saint Paul

The story of Saul's conversion into arguably the most influential disciple of Christ is given to us twice in Acts and is very trodden ground.  As such, I'll skip the normal preamble recounting facts and move onto the analysis.

There are a number of ways one can interpret and apply this story to today...whether it be the Church as Saul, persecuting [insert group here] only to find out that they are persecuting Christ, a slightly more generalized discussion regarding dramatic conversions (a la Norbert, Luther etc.), another examination of epiphanies and personal paradigm shifts or something apologetic about Paul.

Instead...I come back to the well.  Judgment and Mercy and how Saul->Paul reflects the shift from Judaic 'angry-old-man' God to Christian 'loving father' God.

Saul is all about judging.  Judge, jury and executioner.  All about 'Justice'.  You must obey the Law, you must conform and you must be worthy of the Kingdom.  In a metaphorical sense, a strong argument can be made that he represents the authoritarian Church (note caps).

Paul, on the other hand, is not about 'Justice' and drones on for chapters about the futility of the Law as a measure of righteousness.  We're all under the executioner's axe, because we've ALL screwed up somewhere along the lines.  The executioner of the first Christian martyr should know that more than anyone.  So, for Paul, it's about Mercy.

This brings me to a number of places regarding judging...both others and ourselves. Most strongly, though, I keep coming back to my old buddy Mike (aka General of the Armies of Heaven, prince of light, Defender of Chonae, Angel of The Presence, Guardian of the Dead, guy who whooped Satan's butt, etc. etc.).  Micha'el....Who is like God?  Only God may judge.

Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy... 
Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors...

Judge not, lest ye be judged...
Micha'el...

There are days I feel as if my ontology...my reality...is fundamentally different from others.  As if, somehow, I'm the only person who sees that snow is white when everyone else says it's black.  Whether it's matters religious or mundane, in the news or even in casual conversation, it seems that there is a constant low-level misinformation campaign. 

Now, I realise that this gets to the Jesuits..."I will believe the black I see before me is white if the hierarchical Church so defines it".... but I'm not a Jesuit at heart, but a Dominican.

"Follow the Truth, no matter where it may lead." 

I guess that means I'm a heretic, for to follow Truth often requires one to choose and 'the act of choice' is the literal translation for αίρεση and the heart of the matter.

He is the Way, the Truth and the Life.  I choose that.  Some days, it feels that choice is a lonely one and a hard one.

Sex and love...You are made how you are made

Study after study as shown what just about anyone who has been paying attention could tell you about sex.   There are some folks who are sexually aroused by the opposite sex and some who are sexually aroused by the same sex (with a statistically insignificant number being aroused by both or neither) and it is hard-wired, literally.  Much of arousal revolves around differences in brain structure, function and chemistry.  Either you are turned on by boys or girls (and rarely both/neither) and you don't 'choose' one or the other.  It's how you are made.


A recent study from University College London looks at love, not lust, and finds that love is very different.  When men and women are shown images of sexy boys/girls, different parts of their brain light up depending on their orientation.  When people are shown images of people they love, the very same parts of their brain light up.  Men and women, straight and gay. 

Love is love. God is love...and the Divine is within everyone and affects us all in the same way (if we let Her).

It's nice to see that science is finally catching up with philosophy.