A song stuck in my head....and heart

"Even though the day be laden
 and my task dreary
 and my strength small
 a song keeps singing in my heart....

 For I know I am Thine
 I am part of Thee
 Thou art kin to me
 and all my times, all my times are in Thy hands."

 - Hebredian prayer, courtesy of the Celtic Daily Prayer book.

Prayers

I don't ask with frequency, but I would ask for prayers for...

Kit and his family, that sickness would leave him and his liver be healed.

Michelle and her family, that her passing brings closure to long suffering and healing to all.

Will and for Roger, that both them come to terms with who they are and shed the sickness which afflicts them.

Tim, that he grasp the lessons being taught.

Indra, Sa'adi and pandas

Last night, I had the chance to talk with a certain young man.  He recently was rescued (the only term which fits) from Nowhere, Midwest, where his strict Christian family was literally kicking him to the curb because he is (yes, you guessed it) gay. 

He is adjusting to life in BigGayCity, Colorado, but is having some identity issues *feigns shock* and the new friends may not be the most conducive to his finding that.  I mean, moving out of the house is hard enough for anyone.  Being evicted by your parents, driven to another state and dumped into a house-commune of a half-dozen gay men is....challenging.  Toss in a touch of Asperger's, a mind which tends to question and a truly gentle soul and one can imagine how uncertain things are for him right now.

We spoke at length about some spiritual things without being specific.  One of the outcomes of the conversation (other than a pointed need for more conversation) was talking about Indra's Net and that, as we are all part of nature created by the Divine, and that nature (as it was originally designed) is complex, interconnected and perfect, we are all created in the same way.

This afternoon, I ran across a poem which captures so much of what I am feeling and seeing.

The children of Adam are limbs of one body
Having been created of one essence.
When the calamity of time afflicts one limb
The other limbs cannot remain at rest.
If you have no sympathy for the troubles of others
You are not worthy to be called by the name of "man."
                               - Bani Adam, Sa'adi

For this uncertain and well-intentioned soul, I would ask for prayers of loving reassurance and guidance as he navigates in uncharted waters.

Also?  For that young man I mentioned at the first.

miscellany

Ever since the RC potentates decided to rewrite their liturgy, it got me to thinking and a few things have been bouncing about my head for a while.  I figure I should put them to e-paper before I lose them.

I ask, oh Lord, that as we go about our daily lives, you prick our conscience :
That our thoughts become right thoughts.
That those right thoughts become right words
That those right words become right deeds.
Not for us, the Church or the world....but for you alone be the glory.  Amen.

A Pelagian's Confeitor.
Oh Lord, creator of all, You are the spark of the universe and are in all things, yet we are all too often blind to that spark.  In our deeds, we harm the world and, thus, You as well.  Kyrie Eleison.

Christ Jesus, you showed us that within our brothers and sisters lies the Divine, yet we are short-sighted and sometimes do not see this.  In our words, we harm our brothers and sisters and, thus, You as well..  Christe Eleison.

Holy Wisdom, you dwell within us as guide and counselor, yet we are foolish and sometimes do not listen.  In our thoughts, we harm ourselves and, thus, You as well..  Kyrie Eleison.

P: <sign of cross> May the Lord have mercy upon us, forgive us and lead us to everlasting life.
V: Thanks be to God.

Invitation to Communion
P: <holding aloft the cup and host> IDE! ECCE! VOICI! MIRA! BEHOLD! The Lamb of God! <pause> Happy are we who are called to this supper.

V: Lord, you have made me worthy to receive you. Only say the word and I shall be here.

P:Christ came not for a few, but for all.  This table is not meant for the select, but for everyone.  All are welcome!

FUD for thought

The more I read about current events as of late, the sadder I become.  It is not the media, for I know that they thrive on violence, despair and FUD to line their coffers.  It is not the complex kabuki theatre that is politics in the US, for they are just as culpable and capable as the media to borrow trouble for their own ends.  It isn't the rampant hypocrisy of 'certain churches' with their misplaced nostalgia for Victorian values nor the brazen, rapine behaviour of corporate America nor the economic news which should have me wallowing in shadenfreude like pig in slop.

No...it is a deeper thing that connects them all and goes far beyond.

What I see, day in and day out, is a consistent reinforcement of a self-centered approach to reality which is defined by materialism, consumerism and levels of self-absorption which are just stunning.  Time and again it is about 'me' and 'mine', what directly affects me and how I can get/keep/avoid things that are about me.  The corollary is that people in our society don't truly recognize what is going on around them...who is going on around them...and how their actions or non-actions have consequences for other folks.

In short and and brief, we have (individually and collectively) eschewed our mandate as human beings and treat other people as 'Other', not as people. These things are reasonable enough if you are an amoral and soul-less entity solely devoted to the accumulation of material wealth (i.e. a corporation), but when churches, governments and people start acting this way, they are abandoning the core ethic if being human.

What to do?  Where is God in all of this?

Love removes fear, Faith is the antidote of uncertainty and Hope counters destructive doubt.  Our call to do unto others is a near-direct antithesis to the present day, post-structuralist/post-post-modernist capitalist society.
 
Lord, 

Help me see myself in the Other and them in me;
help me see the Christ within and the Christ in all.

Let my hope be an anchor in the storm-tossed sea;
let my faith be a lamp against the present pall.

Help me reflect your love and mercy;
help me see beyond the present squall.
 
Here I am, Lord.
Let me be an instrument of your peace;
let me be the change you wish to see in the world;

Pulp Fiction and prayer. I explain.

Welcome inside Tim's brain.  Mind the gap.

How often have you been in church and heard the prayer go something like this...."oh gracious and merciful Lord, all-knowing and ever-loving creator....."  and then it drones on, reminding said deity of his proper place, the nature of salvation and so on.  Have you ever wondered what it must be like to be on the other end of that conversation?  This particular screed was triggered by the part in the Eucharist where we all, as a group, say "Lord, I am not worthy to receive you.  Only say the word and I shall be healed."

And this is when one of my favourite scenes from Pulp Fiction comes in.  This would be from the 'Bonnie situation'...which I would rename 'the Bennie Situation'.  I shall paraphrase the exact exchange.


Benedict XVI: Mmmm! Mercy, Lord! This is some serious healinz! Usually, me and Georgie would be happy with some Manischewitz right, but he springs this serious gourmet salvation on us! You are truly incredible, did you know this?

God: Knock it off, Bennie.

Benedict XVI: [pause] What?

God: I don't need you to tell me how good I am, okay? I'm the one who is Omniscient. I know how good I am.  Even the devils bow down to me and acknowledge how good I am.  But you know what's on my mind right now? It AIN'T the salvation in this cup, it's the hypocrite in my Church.

Benedict XVI: Oh, God, don't even worry about that...

God: [interupting] No, No, No, No, let me ask you a question. When you came into communion with me, did you notice a sign out in front of My Church that said "Old Hypocrite Protection"?

Benedict XVI: Lord, you know I ain't seen no...

God: [cutting him off again; getting wrathful] Did you notice a sign out in front of My House that said "Old Hypocrite Protection"?

Benedict XVI: [pause] No. I didn't.

God: You know WHY you didn't see that sign?

Benedict XVI: Why?

God: 'Cause it ain't there, 'cause protectin' hypocrites ain't my business, that's why!

At this point, Jehovah goes all Old Testament on their a$$ and such.  At least, that's how it works out in my head.

Anyways...my point is that we tend to pray as if God is some dottering old man who needs to be reminded at every turn how good, powerful and merciful he is and that we're not jews, but under that 'new contract' which doesn't require blood sacrifices or circumcision. 

"Oh Riiiiiiight.  NEW Testament God now...less with the smiting and more with the salvation.  I recall sending the boy out for something, that must have been it.  Probably important, that is.  I should write that down somewhere.  Now where's me spectacles...."

Yes, yes....I realise that this is all silly and the point is not to remind God, but rather to remind the laity about the nature of God, etc. etc. but please....

"Knock it off, my dear cleric. I don't need you to tell me how awesome my God is, okay?  I'm the one who's received salvation from Him (not you).  I know how awesome my God is. "

That's why we're there in the first place.  Don't treat God like a some senile deity and don't treat the Body of Christ like we're all little children.

Just sayin.

Prayers

I would ask for prayers and kind thoughts this season.
 
Pray for those in leadership (both mundane and religious), and know that most are trying to do what they think is best, given the limited information and perspective that they have.

Pray for the Body of Christ, that they may hold onto their faith, do the good work and not conflate the finger (the Church) for the moon (the Message).

Pray for us all, that we may always be grateful for what we have and never be resentful for what others may have.

Last and least, I would ask for prayers for myself, dealing with a number of personal issues simultaneously (as such things are prone to do), the upshot of which is fighting off the Darkness of depression.  I know the Light is there, I just can't see my way out of this box I'm in right now and help would be appreciated.

Kyrie Eleison
Christe Eleison
Kyrie Eleison

Lessons from the saints - All Souls Day and suicide

Today is the feast of All Souls, the companion to yesterday's feast of All Saints.  It is important to recall the discussion about the communion of saints and the Body of Christ, for it impacts what we talk about here. If All-saints is about those of the Body who search and strive, then All-Souls is for those who are no less worthy of love, but are lost or misguided.

During my youth, I was taught that the only sin which was unforgivable was suicide.  I mean, for everything else, no matter how terrible, you could realise the error of your ways, be contrite and reconcile.  But with suicide, you're dead. Done.  End of story.  Guaranteed damnation.

As I said previously, the concept of a unified Body of Christ is foreign to protestantism and the idea of connectivity with all creation (though common in other faith systems) is quite outside my old conception of Christianity, being something I normally associate with the Eastern philosophies. 

Heh...and then along came Billy.   This is where all of my study and reflection ends and my leap of faith begins.

I've written at some length about him and the great similarities between us.  See, I had read about this communion of souls and the belief in prayer being able to affect the disposition of the soul after death, but it was, shall we say, theory.  I had never prayed for the soul of anyone, let alone someone I never knew.  Yet, I felt how vitally important it is, to ask for our Lord, whose mercy is infinite and love without bounds, to show those gifts to one who felt so judged, unloved and rejected that they could bear living no more...to welcome His child home.

I...have no proof of the efficacy of my prayers, but I will say that it is my firm belief that after several days of assiduous and ardent supplication that I felt my request was heard and answered.

This day is about praying with our brothers and sisters in the Body of Christ for those we know are lost, who have strayed from the path and yet are not beyond salvation.  In the last two months alone, at least 16 teens have, due to bullying and social pressure, taken their own lives. May, Oh Lord, you grant unto them your infinite forgiveness, mercy and love so that they may be at peace in your warm embrace.  Grant these things to all your lost children, I pray merciful Father, and even unto me.

Kyrie Elieson

Christe Elieson

Kyrie Elieson

Lessons from Saints - Sergius and Bacchus

Today is the feast of Saints Sergius and Bacchus, the first and most prominent of the 'paired' saints.

Sergius (aka Serge) and Bacchus were highly-placed roman soldiers and gay lovers (ἐραστἐς) at the turn of the 4th century AD.  Favoured of Emperor Maximianus, they rose to some stature until their love of Christ was discovered.  Bacchus was tortured to death and Sergius was tortured and then beheaded.  To the end, they loved both our Lord and each other.  The story of their martyrdom, known as the Passion of Sergius and Bacchus, is considered one of the first well documented cases of martyrdom and they are some of the very earliest saints to be venerated in the manner we know now.

Do note, the Romans had no great issue with their homosexuality.  Neither did the people of the early church.  Some of the later hagiographic stories refer to them as 'brothers' or don't mention their relationship at all, but the early sources are rather plain about their relationship as being far more than 'brotherly' in nature.

I believe a more salient and enduring lesson can be derived from these early martyrs, however.

Given the recent epidemic of hatred, intolerance and fundamentally unchristian behaviour by so many (especially by those who call themselves follower of Christ), I believe it would be instructive to recall the words echoed by Saint Sergius in the hour of his death.

"For you wish all to be saved and to come to knowledge of the truth. When you lay death upon them (the pagans who were to kill Sergius), accept their repentance, Lord, and do not remember the sin of ignorance which they have perpetrated against us for your sake. Enlighten the eyes of their minds and lead them to the knowledge of you."

Merciful father,

I pray that those who have been victims of hatred and intolerance find your compassion and love in both this life and the next, no matter how they may cross that bridge.

I pray that those who have inflicted these pains be enlightened to the suffering they have caused, may their hard hearts softened to the plights of those about them and know the forgiveness and tenderness of your mercy if they turn from their errors and ask for reconciliation.

I pray, oh Lord, that you would show unto us all  that same mercy and love, and I pray that we may be able to show that same mercy and love to those who do such injustices to both ourselves and to my brothers and sisters, who are all of creation.

I pray that we may have the strength of Serge and Bacchus to stand up for what is right, believe when all are against us and run the good race for your glory oh Lord.

Amen

Nunc aspicio, nunc scio, semper credo

It's all so simple.

The scales fall like coins from my eyes and I rise from my slumber of study to have the truth rise and greet me like the dawn.

The forms of things are not the things.  The names are not what is, only a pale shadow. 

Indeed, dear Anglic Doctor, it is all straw.

All the erudition is of effect only when it does not distract, all the pages are of profit only when they enrich our soul and the world.

We are all part of the Sacred which we forget and make mundane.
We are all part of Creation which we forget and make our enemy. 
We are all the children of God which we forget and sin.
We are all the body of Christ which we forget and divide.

We shall glorify you, oh great Divine,
       and not forget your place in our lives.
We shall love you, oh Maker of All,
       and love all your creation and all your children.
We shall honour you, oh God our Father,
       and remember that we are your children.
We shall give you praise, oh blessed Lord
      and know that we are all an instrument of your peace.

Thanks be to you, oh gracious and wonderous Lord,
      all glory and honour be to you.
May all the creatures of creation praise and magnify your name,
      especially this little blind one who does now see.

Aspicio, Scio, Credo

Gloria In Excelsis Deo

Gloria in Excelsis Deo

Glory to God in the highest

and peace to all people on earth.

Lord God, heavenly King, Almighty God and Father,

we worship you, we give you thanks,

we praise you for your glory.

Lord Jesus Christ, only Son of the Father,

Lord God, Lamb of God,

you take away the sin of the world:

have mercy on us;

You are seated at the right hand of the Father:

receive our prayer.

For you alone are the Holy One,

you alone are the Lord,

you alone are the Most High,

Jesus Christ,

with the Holy Spirit,

in the glory of God the Father. Amen.

Thanks and praise to you, almighty Lord.

Addendum to the earlier post

For all of us...including Billy.

1 candle is light enough when all is darkness

Billy Lucas had been the target of bullying at school for years because he was 'different'. He fought it for years, but nothing changed His peers considered it common knowledge, but did nothing. The teachers and school administrators saw nothing wrong and did nothing. Unable to handle the abuse any further, Billy took matters into his own hands last Thursday. His parents found the body the next day. Billy was 15.

For as long as I can remember, I have been like Billy - 'different', the outsider, alone, the 'other'. Even today, there are many times where I feel excluded and shunned due to who I am and how God has made me. There are thousands, tens of thousands of us who grew up like Billy, who live in a world like his. What strikes me is this:

His society, the students and teachers and administrators, saw what was happening and did nothing. They turned their backs on him when help was needed. They, by omission, have his blood on their hands. If only one person had spoken up, one person stood up for what is right...then perhaps the story would have ended differently.

“Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves;
ensure justice for those being crushed.
Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless,
and see that they get justice.” (Proverbs 31:8-9)



For Billy, may he find the infinite mercy and forgiveness of our Lord.
For his parents, may they find the comfort and solace of our Lord's compassion.
For the community, may their consciences be pricked
For those of us like Billy, may they know that we are NOT alone.
For all of us, let us be a voice for the voiceless.

For this, I pray.

Thanks to the Divine

We are the body of Christ.

When we see the oppressed and do not turn away, we are His eyes.

When we listen to the cries of others, we are His ears.

When we do the good work of the church, we are His hands.

When we march for justice, we are His feet.

When we come closer to Abba God through study and prayer, we are His mind.

When we show love and compassion, we are His heart.

We are the body of Christ.

Amen.

comment: This meditation is an extension of St. Augustine's comments on the Church and came into my mind unbidden this morning. May it enlighten and inspire. Thanks be to Him.

To everything there is a season......

After long bouts of illnesses for many years, my former brother in law, John Cecil, breathed his last and passed over about an hour ago.

May the Spirit comfort those he left behind, his father James, wife Evelyn, son Jason, and sisters Kris and Naomi in this trying time in their lives.

Kyrie Elieson

Christi Elieson

Kyrie Elieson

Mary Magdalene, part deux

This weekend our parish is celebrating the feast of Mary Magdalene. Given the recent discussions on multiple blogs and other places regarding the Roman Church, people leaving and general hate and discontent, I would humbly offer this prayer.

O Lord,

For the many today who are lost, who feel hurt, excluded and driven away by a church who means well but is blind to the damage that they have caused, we ask that their faith be strengthened to be like that of Mary Magdalene.

For the Roman Church, we ask that the scales be lifted from their eyes and that they may hear Christ call unto them and see our Risen Lord as Mary Magdalene did.

Kyrie Elieson

Christi Elieson

Kyrie Elieson

A simple request

I know that there are more folks who read this than say anything. I would ask for prayers.

My former Brother-in-law is...well, they're meeting today with the ethics committee to 'decide' to remove him from life support. He has been ill for many years and it is his wish. Still, that's easy words and hard deeds to, as Daddy Cecil put it, kill your own son.

Thus, I would ask for prayers.
Not for John, for his life is at a close and I am certain his eternal reward is at hand.
Not for myself, for I am at peace with this and, honestly, consider it a sweet release.

Rather, I ask for prayers for the family he leaves behind. His father James, wife Evelyn and sisters Kris and Naomi. May they find the love, compassion and peace that passes all understanding in during this difficult time.

Kyrie Elieson

Christi Elieson

Kyrie Elieson

Memorial day prayer

Oh Lord, in memory of those who have fallen fighting injustice and tyranny, both in and out of uniform, grant us:

the wisdom to discern Your will
the courage to trust in your infinite benefice and
the strength to do what we know is right

as you have done for those who have come before us.

Amen.